Had a good day yesterday, got a lot done and read through three proposed books. I am not the best writer but I hope one day to be a bestseller. This said all I can give is my personal opinion.
From looking at new authors works coming across my desk and writing myself it is a good way to learn how to write as well as what not to do. I think of myself as a reader, I would call myself an expert because I read on average a book a week and when I was single a book every two days. Because of this I can spot a good book or good writing very fast, but that is way different then writing a good book. I look at my own work and cringe, it does get better but it is all part of learning.
Things I have found that I do or did and others do as well that may not be so hot.
Skipping heads. Talking from point of view and jumping into another characters head. Bad.
Jumping ship. One story to another back to story one and then to some other unrelated story. No flow or reason and instead of helping the story it hurts.
Going to fast. Going from meeting a person to loving them in one chapter.
Knowing things they should not know. A character knows something they shouldn't, or does everything right all the time. Make time fail or fall, I like to see some bad things happen to the hero, don't you?
No hook at the end of the chapters. Put a hook or leave them hanging so it drives them to the next chapter... will make your reader stay up till 2am.
Just some random thoughts... take it or leave it...